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Season 2 Episode 13: How to Embrace Your Space After Divorce & Other Life Transitions With Sarah Grace

 

When Sarah was a child, she was faced with her parent’s divorce. Her world and her life had changed. Sarah found that cleaning up, organizing and owning her space helped her cope, and began her path to helping others become more organized.

 

As Sarah set out on her professional path of organizing homes, she found that most of her clients were going through major and at times traumatizing life transitions. This led her to develop a more intentional way of decluttering. In Sarah’s words “The transformation of space can be a vehicle of healing.” Even the simple task of sorting through clothes makes you revisit the significance and meaning of certain things in your life.

 

 

In this episode, Sarah walks us through the ways that you can transform your space and heal following a divorce and how you can help your kids heal by setting up their new spaces.

 

Sarah’s 5 Step “S.P.A.C.E” Process:

Sort – Pull items out and separate into sorted piles according to category or use.

 

Purge – Make decisions of what to donate, toss or sell.

 

Arrange – Select items that have earned their place. Put them in optimal placements for use.

 

Containerize – Measure everything and make sure you have the right containers and hangers.

 

Establish maintenance system – Put in place routines to keep the system going and organized.

 

Common Challenges & Tips:

  • Some people hold onto or throw away too much when they are in the moment, especially when its emotionally driven. Support of a neutral third party can help keep you balanced and intentional.

  •  

  • This task can feel daunting due to the volume of things you have and the emotional connections to them. Take advantage of this moment to gain clarity.

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  • Most people don’t know where to begin. Start with 5-10 minutes and a small area.

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  • 2 books to help you on this journey – >Minimalism: Live a Meaningful Life and Outer Order, Inner Calm

 

Fun fact: The average home has 300,000 items in it!

 

Our Takeaway: Decision making and letting go is a muscle that you can build on starting with the physical things in your life. When we are clear about what we want in our space, we can be clear about what we want in our lives. Your space is a reflection of you.”

 

Guest Info: Sarah Grace is the creator of the revolutionary Break Up Organizing method that supports individuals in reclaiming their physical space after any type of significant life loss, whether that be the ending of a romantic relationship, the loss of a loved one, or even a job transition.Sarah is also the founder of Embrace Your Space NYC, which specializes in residential organizing for individuals.

 

Epsiode Transcript

Jennifer: Welcome to Divorce & Other Things You Can Handle, a branded podcast from Worthy. I’m Jennifer Butler and I’m your host. When I started researching to prepare for this episode, I found myself getting really inspired. I wanted to begin with a single quote about clutter and space and ended up discovering a few that I would actually like to share with you here now. Louise Smith says, “You can’t reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday’s junk.” Katrina Mayer reminds us that when you get rid of clutter, you may just find it was blocking the door you’ve been looking for. Wayne L. Misner says, “Keeping baggage from the past will leave no room for happiness in the future.” Removing the old to make room for the new is a very powerful stuff in the process of healing.

 

Our guest today, Sarah Grace, is here to talk to us about Breakup Organizing and the importance of transforming and embracing your space after a life transition and how you can begin this in your own space right now. We’re going to take a quick break and we’ll be right back to talk with Sarah Grace.

 

Jennifer: Sarah Grace is the creator of the revolutionary breakup organizing method that supports individuals in reclaiming their physical space after any type of significant loss, whether that’d be the ending of a romantic relationship, the loss of a loved one or even a job transition. Sarah is also the founder of Embrace Your Space New York City, which specializes in residential organizing for individuals. Sarah brings a background as a teacher to every client interaction, transferring skills and fostering skills and new habits that will help individuals take control of their living environment. Sarah, thank you so much for being here to talk with us today.

 

Sarah: It’s a treat to be here. Thanks for having me, Jennifer.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. Absolutely. I’m excited to talk about today because it’s a fun way to heal, to transform, to start a new life. I’m really excited to bring this to everyone that’s listening.

 

Sarah: Wonderful.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. Let’s start with you just telling us a little bit about yourself, how you started doing the work that you do and why you’re so passionate about it.

 

Sarah:Sure. Back when I was a special education teacher, organizing with a hobby and then eventually a side hustle for me. It’s always been something that I really enjoy, creating calm and order of chaos.

 

Jennifer: Right.

 

Sarah:I was that kid who would go over to my friends’ houses and clean their rooms for them.

 

Jennifer: I need you.

 

Sarah:Yeah, but it was also a coping mechanism for me during my parents’ divorce. I went back and forth between their two homes every two weeks or so. It took a lot of comfort in setting up my spaces to quell some of the chaos of the divorce. You can imagine how delighted I was as an adult to find out that organizing is a profession.

 

Jennifer: Yeah.

 

Sarah:Actually, an entire industry. I started out by doing a lot of closets and kitchens and helping busy New Yorkers make the most of their tiny New York spaces and helping them move and settle into their new homes.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. Oh my gosh. I love that. I just want to highlight the point about when you were a child, really helping you calm down the chaos. That’s just so powerful. I know that’s where we’re going to be going with this today, but it’s really interesting that you experience that as a child and how you’ve brought that forward into your professional life.

 

Sarah:Yeah. Just as the quotes that you’ve mentioned earlier hint out, there’s a real symbolic powerful meaning behind the act of organizing and decluttering that is releasing the old and welcoming the new. It seems at first glance like it’s a very concrete, straightforward task, but it also has a much deeper, more profound effect on our lives.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. Just even in energetic terms, how much space we have. It’s just this releasing of old energy. It really does open space, right?

 

Sarah:Mm-hmm (affirmative).

 

Jennifer: Yeah. When I was prepping for this, my idea was, I’m going to have this one quote and I’m just going to start it with that. I was getting so inspired when I was researching for our discussion today. That’s why I included a few quotes because it really is a lot more powerful than I think most of us give it credit for.

 

Sarah:That’s what I love about it. On a surface, the concrete task of taking control and making decisions, and then, also, the way to go deeper with that and have it really ripple out into other areas of our lives.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. Tell us what breakup organizing is and why it’s important for, really, anyone going through a life transition.

 

Sarah:Sure. Pretty early on in my organizing journey, I found that people who came to me were going to through major life moments, not just in need of closet makeover or general decluttering but people in the midst of major emotional upheaval. This was mostly the dissolutions of relationships, but also, loss of loved one, empty nesters or job transitions. The beautiful thing about this is that it mirrored a powerful experience I, myself, have had which brings me to Breakup Organizing. I have a mentor who I work with. One of the things she says is that, “We’re all here to teach others what it is we, ourselves, need to learn.” That’s certainly true in my case.

 

Jennifer: Yeah.

 

Sarah:I do this work because I have lived it myself. I’ve gone through a deeply painful breakup of my own. It was very upsetting and quite dramatic and ended a seven-year relationship. The healing and the ultimate moving on that came was a result of a lot of work I did with resetting and transforming my own relationship with my space. We see this play out in a lot of other ways. Some of us turn to our relationship with food or our bodies or finding a new career or calling to help us get unstuck and empowered. There are many paths to healing, but for me, in that terribly painful moment when everything else felt very unsafe and out of control. I found solace in my space. For me, it became a constant and became a primary relationship for me, my space. I was able to transform it into a vehicle of healing.

 

Jennifer: That’s amazing. Vehicle feeling for yourself and then, now, for others.

 

Sarah:Yeah. As I went through the process, I became aware of how powerful it was and as I sorted clothes, I was sorting through my feelings. I was reflecting on my things and my space and the significance of everything that I had invited into my life. Every night, I would come home and I would look around my space. I would remove items that was reminding me of him. I was filling holes that he left behind when he moved out. I was adding in pieces that now reflect me. I began crafting a space and by extension of life that really reflected me and a life that I loved. Every decision became about what was the service of my highest self and my happiness and my fulfillment. The magical thing was that, after I went through this journey of reclaiming my space on my own, I was introduced to others who seem to be longing for the same experience. That’s really how Breakup Organizing was formed.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. It’s so interesting because I, too, went through a divorce about nine years ago. It never even really occurred to me just how powerful the space around me was. One of my very best friends, just instinctively came in one day and she was like “We need to at least change your bedroom, your sheets.” Just what you’re seeing, the colors and just start there. I thought, “Okay, whatever. That’s fine. We can do that. That’s fun.” Once we did it, I couldn’t believe how powerful it was for me to be able to look around and see things that I have purchased, things that meant something to me and didn’t remind me.

 

Sarah:Right.

 

Jennifer: Everything has a story, right?

 

Sarah:Mm-hmm (affirmative).

 

Jennifer: It’s super powerful. It’s amazing that you’ve created something around this.

 

Sarah:It’s such a simple shift, what you described, but so powerful.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. Absolutely.

 

Sarah:I’ve come to believe that the space around us is often a reflection of what’s going on inside of us. The really neat thing about my work is that I get to see this incredible transformation play out, first, on the inside and then also see it ripple outside to other areas of our lives. Our space can reflect what’s happening inside of us, but it can also affect it and create powerful shifts as you just described with your bedroom.

 

Jennifer: Yeah.

 

Sarah:One of my favorite clients of all time was Roberta. Roberta was about three years into her divorce following a 44-year marriage when she called me. At that point, she had already reclaimed her living room, her dining room, her kitchen, but she just couldn’t bring herself to step foot into the bedroom that she had shared with her husband for over decades. The former master bedroom had become a dumping ground for all paperwork, family memorabilia, household items. Really, anything that brought up unpleasant feelings. Roberta had moved in to one of the guest bedrooms. She had found a way to exist in the apartment without ever having to interact with her marital bedroom. It was almost like she just stockpile that room with so much junk that she wouldn’t even be able to enter it.

 

Jennifer: Right.

 

Sarah:She called me with a critical surgery coming up. She enlisted my guidance in tackling this room so that her daughters and her friends could use it to stay there with her during her post surgery recovery. Almost in passing, Roberta mentioned to me that she had recently been on a path of looking into her mother’s Mexican heritage. She had been to Mexico and just been there to connect with that part of herself. That really sparked something. We determined that we could reimagine this old master bedroom and turn it into her Mexico room as a way to honor the heritage of her mother and her identity and really writhe some life back into it. During our time together, we not only blessed and released items and residue from her marriage, but we transformed this room into this whole new space and then turn it into a peaceful sanctuary that really lived up to the Mexico room designation. It also took on a new name and friends and family who came to stay with Roberta, started calling it the healing room because it was just so serene and calm and peaceful.

 

Roberta actually ended up moving back into that room herself after the surgery, which had never been part of the plan but really sacrifice that was once too painful to even step foot in really became an important tool in helping support her to heal and move forward.

 

Jennifer: You know what so powerful about that is, we talk about healing, obviously for ourselves, but when we heal, we really do heal past generations and future generations to come. In that one small room, the amount of healing that she did for herself and then extended out to her family is, it’s invaluable.

 

Sarah: Absolutely.

 

Jennifer: Wow. Yeah.

 

Sarah: Such a nice physical representation of the shift that also happened inside.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. I love that.

 

Sarah: A lot of the time, of course, there are kids involved when it comes to divorce.

 

Jennifer: Right.

 

Sarah: That was the case with another client of mine, [Elisa 00:12:00]. She reached out to me when she was preparing for the daunting past of moving out of her marital home. She and her husband were splitting and she enlisted my help for the move in setting up both her new apartment for her and her kids and also, the existing apartment for her ex and the kids. Over the course of a week, Elisa and I went through their five-bedroom home. We packed up what was meaningful to her to bring to the new place while also setting up the existing space that it wouldn’t feel like there were holes left behind by her.

 

Jennifer: Right.

 

Sarah: We moved into the new space and set it up as consistently as possible for the kid’s transition. The focus the whole time was on how to make this transition as smooth as possible for the kids who were like five, seven and 10, around there.

 

Jennifer: Right.

 

Sarah: There were some hard decisions to be made about who kept the family scrapbooks, how to split the toys between the homes and even how much of this process to expose the kids to. I helped Elisa navigate this. It was intense, but it was very successful. They’re now setup in their new space. The kids are adjusting to the routines. Both spaces are now loving support of spaces to come home to. Well, it could’ve been a really chaotic and upsetting time was instead a really intentional and loving transition into their next chapter as a family.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. That’s what really stood out for me was the intentionality of it. It’s how much you involve the kids, what do you bring. All of that is really a judgment call. Each person will make that decision, but the intentionality of it, the conscious choosing. That, I think, is what makes that standout and is so powerful not only for her but for her kids.

 

Sarah: Yeah. Such important groundwork to life for her was to come next to them.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. Yeah. Thank you for sharing those really powerful stories.

 

Sarah: Sure.

 

Jennifer: There’s a five-step process that you use called, SPACE. What I’m excited about, not only with you sharing this but people who are listening can actually start to implement this on their own with this method that you’re going to talk to us about.

 

Sarah: Yes. Breakup Organizing is a multi-day, intensive, immersive experience that goes way beyond just a stuff, but I did want to give our listeners some organizing tips today that they can implement right away. I’d love to share with you the five-step process that I use.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. That’s great.

 

Sarah: As you mentioned, it’s an acronym for SPACE. This was a process that was designed, originally, by Julie Morgenstern who was one of the pioneers in the organizing field. SPACE stands for sort, purge, arrange, containerize and establish a maintenance system. I’ll walk you through the steps.

 

Jennifer: Okay.

 

Sarah: First is sort. When we’re working with a space, we pull all of the items out; the closet, the kitchen or whatever we’re tackling. We sort all items putting like with life. We’re not making any decisions yet. We’re just simply sorting.

 

Jennifer: Okay. Just like creating piles, pulling it all out. This is very good to have fun and get messy, I think, right?

 

Sarah: Yes. Yeah, make piles. I always have stickies with me. I’m always making lots of labels so that we can sort things just very preliminarily. We move on to purge, which was when we actually start making decisions. During the purge stage, we toss anything that’s no longer usable. We donate, consign, recycle anything that is usable, but it does not need to be in our space any longer. Because I find that, often, we can more easily let go of items if we know they’re going to a good home. Thrift stores are a great way to pass items onto homes where they’ll be used and loved rather than just taking up space in our closets.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. I imagine as I’m looking at this that the sorting is so important, not only in the fun of getting messy, but sometimes, I’m thinking it’s easier to purge when you see everything you have, right?

 

Sarah: Mm-hmm (affirmative).

 

Jennifer: If it’s sitting there on the closet by itself, it’s almost like you’re afraid to get rid of it.

 

Sarah: Right.

 

Jennifer: If you see this pile, then it’s like “Oh, okay, maybe I don’t need that because I have this.”

 

Sarah: Right. I have how many black leggings. Yeah.

 

Jennifer: Right. Exactly. Exactly. I don’t need all 50 of those.

 

Sarah: Right. Yeah. Also, when you pull everything out and you seem to manage and everything, it was a switch or flips like “Okay, it’s time to get control over this.”

 

Jennifer: Yeah.

 

Sarah: It’s easier to make decisions when you really have the lay of the land and you see everything laid out.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. No, that makes a lot of sense.

 

Sarah: For people who are interested in consigning or selling items, a few size that I use that have been really helpful are offer up the real, real thread up and buffalo exchange. Those are all great resources for selling items. Of course, if you’re donating, you can always get a tax deduction for that as well.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. That’s great.

 

Sarah: That brings us to A for arrange. On a very basic level, this just means we’re putting back what has earned its place in our space with the items where we’re using the most often and the most convenient spaces and the grab stones, which are chest and head height and then lesser use items will go high or down low. Keeping like items with like and making sure that we have items and meaning and significance out where we could get to enjoy them, not boxed away and forgotten about gathering dust. For this part, I like to say, “Put some music on.” Let this be a fun part of the process and putting your space back together in a way that delights you. We know that on the surface, we’re putting things away, but on a deeper level, we are laying the foundation for a new life and a new space because we’ve let go of the old and we’re really making space for what’s to come.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. I love what you said at the very beginning of this of arrange, which was things that have earned our space in our life. Things that have earned space in our life, I love that.

 

Sarah: Yeah. Things need to earn their place in our space or-

 

Jennifer: Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

 

Sarah: Especially where I work in Manhattan, space is a premium. We can’t afford to be holding onto things that are not adding to our lives.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. It’s just a mind check. It’s something very simple, but when you think about that in that way, if something is going to be in your home, it has to have earned its spot.

 

Sarah: Right.

 

Jennifer: It’s very powerful.

 

Sarah: Yeah.

 

Jennifer: Okay. We have arrange. Then?

 

Sarah: Then we containerize, which is the fun part.

 

Jennifer: Yeah.

 

Sarah: People often like to get ahead of ourselves and we go buy items before the process, but I really say that this is better saved until the end because it’s only at this point that we actually know what’s staying in the space and how to best store it. Once we’ve determined what’s staying and where to best put it, then we’ll measure the space, measure the items to make sure that we get the proper bins, baskets, hangers, files, whatever we need. I like to say that containers are natural limit setters. When a bin or space is full or overflowing, that’s your cue to go through it and pair down again.

 

Jennifer: It’s like a boundary for space, right?

 

Sarah: Exactly. Yeah.

 

Jennifer: That’s awesome.

 

Sarah: We wrap up with E for establish a maintenance system. We finish up by putting into place routines to help the newly organized space stay tidy long after I’m gone. I say that getting organized is like doing a laundry. You can’t just do it once and expect that it’s done forever. It’s a system that needs constant attention or we go to speed right back where you started.

 

Jennifer: Right.

 

Sarah: We figure out habits that are most conducive to how you live and how you use the space. It could be the one in one out policy for clothing or setting a five-minute timer every evening at the end of the day to pick up items and put them away. One of my favorite authors, Gretchen Rubin, who wrote The Happiness Project and just came out with a book called, Outer Order, Inner Calm. She likes to say that tasks that can be done at any time are often done at no time. She suggests that anything that can be done in less than a minute should be done right away. That’s hanging up the shirt that you decided not to wear today, washing that dish you just dirtied, toss in the junk mail when it comes in, hanging up your coat when you walk at the door. Small things like that, just do them right away without delay.

 

Jennifer: I know when I am productive in that way, they’re like little winds. I know, after I do a bunch of those task, I start to feel momentum and patting myself on the back like “Man, I’m awesome.”

 

Sarah: Totally.

 

Jennifer: “I could get [crosstalk 00:20:16].”

 

Sarah: Yeah. It’s like what they always say about how the most successful people always make their bed in the morning. It’s like the small things that really make a big difference.

 

Jennifer: It’s so true. That’s so true. Okay. I’m going to take a really quick break right here and then, we are going to be back with Sarah Grace. We’re going to continue talking about Breakup Organizing. We’re going to just talk about some of the challenges that listeners might face when they do take on the task and the possibility of Breakup Organizing their own space. We’ll be right back with Sarah Grace.

 

Jennifer: Welcome back to divorce and other things you can handle. We’re here talking to Sarah Grace about organizing your space after a life transition. Sarah just finished talking to us about her five-step process called, SPACE, which is sort, purge, arrange, containerize and establish a maintenance system. Now, I just want to talk to our listeners about some of the challenges that, maybe, they’ll face. I imagine that things come up or things get in the way. What are some things that they can expect could come up for them.

 

Sarah: Well, one thing I hear a lot from people who reflect on their experience of divorce because this is such an overwhelming, confusing, chaotic time that they look back and they regret either holding on to too much stuff because they didn’t have the bandwidth to face at the time. They end up keeping much more than they should have, which means that they have this monumental task of sorting through it years later. Or in an attempt to just make a clean and easy exit, they leave behind items that they later wish they hadn’t forfeited.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. I can relate for the latter. I think I threw away things thinking, “Oh, I’m purging and I just threw it all away.” It’s almost 10 years later moments when I’m like “Darn it. I really wish I have that. I really wish I would’ve held on to it.”

 

Sarah: Yeah. We’re not really working on all cylinders in those moments.

 

Jennifer: No. Definitely not. What could I have done differently are what can our listeners … is it enlisting a friend to help them, maybe-

 

Sarah: Yes. Definitely, the support of a neutral third-party who can show up with no private agenda, just wanting to be there to support you and help you make this decision from a place of real intention. Because I hear from people in the midst of the craziness of divorce when they’re up here with legal proceedings, arrangements for the kids, finances, everything that’s going on is that thinking about their stuff is like the last thing they think they can handle.

 

Jennifer: Yeah.

 

Sarah: They always think, “I’ll just deal with that later,” but I actually think this is the right moment to handle this. Taking this moment to get clear on what you want allows you to then move forward into your new phase with clarity and feeling more empowered and not weighed down by the baggage of all of the stuff and all of these decisions there then looming over us.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. It’s almost like if you can start with something that is as simple as your stuff, it’s almost, again, like before you were saying, picking up momentum so that you gain that momentum, and you’re able to then allow it to overflow into these other areas of your life.

 

Sarah: Yeah. For sure. It’s also about looking at how can we see this differently and where can we see an opportunity that would, otherwise, be dubbed a tragedy. Maybe moving to a smaller space becomes an opportunity to live with less and become unburdened by our stuff or an old engagement ring that, otherwise, just collect dust and remind you of what didn’t work out becomes … thanks to Worthy-

 

Jennifer: Exactly.

 

Sarah: … clash for a new endeavor that something that’s really meaningful to you like a trip or starting a new business or moving to a new city. It’s about getting support and then also being willing to see things differently and see things as opportunities.

 

Jennifer: Yeah. I love that. Okay. What other challenges might take place?

 

Sarah: Yeah. The challenge of taking advantage of this moment to gain clarity and make empowered decisions about your space and your life as a big one in a smaller scale, I’d say that the prospect of just getting organized can feel really daunting. There’s a reason why it’s always the top of people’s New Year’s resolution lists. It’s not easy and it’s not something you can just do and then be done with it forever. It’s hard, simply, just looking at our stuff. It’s really easy to become unintentional about our stuff and our space and the things that come into our space. Raising our level of consciousness and evaluating our space in our lives is just plain uncomfortable.

 

Jennifer: Yeah.

 

Sarah: A lot of resistance comes up, which is another reminder to enlist the help of someone you trust to be with you during the process.

 

Jennifer: Yeah.

 

Sarah: It’s important to have help because it’s so easy to run away or distract yourself with something else.

 

Jennifer: Right. Absolutely.

 

Sarah: Yeah. The average home actually has 300,000 items in it, which is just-

 

Jennifer: Wow.

 

Sarah: … plain daunting.

 

Jennifer: Wow.

 

Sarah: As much as you can do to break it down into smaller bites, the more manageable it’s going to seem. Either tackling one room at a time or tackling one category with clothing or books at a time, that’s going to feel much more manageable. I actually created a 15-week scavenger hunt style challenge to help people methodically go through each area of their home to chip away slowly. If you want to start but you’re overwhelmed and let’s say you just have five minutes, then set yourself a timer, tuck a little small pile somewhere and dive in. I think you’ll find that decision making is a muscle. Give yourself time and patience as you develop it and it will get easier as you go.

 

I also find that sometimes it takes a bit of inspiration from other people. Two books that I really like to recommend to people who are looking for a little bit of extra hand holding, one is by the Minimalists and their first book is called, Minimalism: Live a Meaningful Life but really, anything they’ve written will be helpful. The other, I mentioned earlier is Outer Order, Inner Calm by Gretchen Rubin. Those are two great resources for people who want some inspiration before they dive in.

 

Jennifer: That’s great. What about the Scavenger Hunt, is that something you do with your clients or is that something … is it like an online …

 

Sarah: Yeah. That, I believe is a [inaudible 00:27:17] on my website. I’m also happy to provide that to anyone who wants to email me directly.

 

Jennifer: Okay. Great. We’ll provide that information at the end. Just that you’re talking about this, what really has dawned on me is, this is really an act of self-love. Not only self-love but self-care. I think that a lot of times, we think about self-care like going to get a massage or taking the bubble bath, but it really is about respecting your space, creating boundaries and getting clear, right?

 

Sarah: Yes.

 

Jennifer: Doing all these things that we can be our best selves. It’s just a really beautiful act of self-love and self-care.

 

Sarah: Yeah, and being comfortable and learning to make decisions, what do I want in my space, what do I want in my life, what is it costing me to have things come in that I haven’t invited.

 

Jennifer: That very specific question, what is this costing me, I’m a coach as well and that is one of the questions that I use and ask all the time because I don’t think we really think about what certain actions or things or behaviors or people are costing us. When we think about it and we really get down to the cost, it’s like “Wow.” It’s completely different perspective.

 

Sarah: Yeah. Yeah.

 

Jennifer: No, I think that’s brilliant. Okay. This is the question, we’re coming to the end here, but I ask all of my guests this question, just from your unique perspective, because you are in the space, you’re meeting with people, you are inspiring and influencing and all of that. From you to our listeners, what is possible for those who are listening when they are willing to take the step in transitioning their physical space?

 

Sarah: I really believe it is possible to emerge from the chaos and the pain of divorce with clarity and the support in place needed to thrive. Just like decision making is a muscle, I think that letting go is a muscle. The more you do it, the easier it becomes over time. I certainly know that to be true when it comes to stuff, when we go through this process with the concrete with our space and our stuff, knowing that as the muscles build, the skills ripple out into other areas. As we become more clear and intentional about what we want in our space, we become more clear about what we want in our lives and we make wiser choices and we live a life of greater awareness and intent. I found it’s a very powerful process of discernment as your space takes shape, you realize that you suddenly learn what’s important to you and that you’re capable of making decisions in alignment with those choices and designing a life that you love.

 

Jennifer: I love that. I love what you said about letting go being a muscle as well that you have to develop. We hear about decision making and making choices and all that, but yeah, letting go really is something that we need to develop and does get easier with the more practice we give it.

 

Sarah: Mm-hmm (affirmative).

 

Jennifer: All right. Well, thank you so much. We’re at the end. Do you have any final thoughts for us?

 

Sarah: Yeah. I would like to simply say, don’t underestimate the power of your space to support you or sabotage you. I learned that when you make decisions about what you want in your space, it becomes easier to make decisions about what you want in your life and that saying, “How you do anything is how you do everything”?

 

Jennifer: Yeah.

 

Sarah: Well, I so believe that. You’ll discover that your space is a reflection of you and it’s about inspiration and nourishment and comfort. When you find yourself in your own moment of a breakup, whether it’s someone you’ve lived with for four years or a marriage of over 40 or you lost a job or loved one, it’s so important that you use your space to consciously support you.

 

Jennifer: Thank you so much. How can our listeners follow up with you?

 

Sarah: My website is embraceyourspaceNYC.com. They can also email me at sarah@embraceyourspaceNYC.com and anyone who wants to get their hands on that 15-week Scavenger Hunt, send me an email. I’m happy to send it over to you.

 

Jennifer: Okay. Perfect.

 

Sarah: I’m also on social media @embracespaceNYC.

 

Jennifer: Awesome. It’s been such a pleasure having you here and talking to you. I know our audience is going to get moving on their space and start sorting, purging, arranging, containerizing and establishing that system for maintenance. Thank you so much.

 

Sarah: Thank you for having me, Jennifer. It’s been a pleasure.

 

Jennifer: Thank you Sarah Grace for joining us today and to all of our listeners for tuning in. Next week, we’ll be joined by Carrie Davidson, the first of a four-part series where we’ll be taking a deep dive into how to use a very specific roadmap using modern science, ancient Chinese medicine and a whole lot of love in order to heal and thrive. Make sure you subscribe so you can catch every new episode of divorce and other things you can handle in your weekly feed. If you like what you hear, rate and review us to help other women like you be able to find us. You can find out more @worthy.com/podcast.

 

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