By Laura Lifshitz
When times are tough especially financially after a divorce, it can be hard to believe that things will get better.
In the three and a half years that my ex and I have been done, my financial life has been a roller coaster of ups and downs. And by ups I don’t mean vacations and all, but just being okay and not fretting over rent or health insurance. Being able to see friends, set aside a few dollars and have some breathing room. The downs? No breathing room but just heavy breathing wondering if I could buy groceries, pay rent and keep paying that health insurance premium.
Unfortunately, I entered into divorce just starting out in the work force full-time after a hiatus of working full-time for a few years.
Whether you are just starting to work or are managing a bit of a financial mess after a divorce, how do you have faith that it gets better?
On a daily basis, I do certain visualizations regarding money.
This may make me sound quacky, but I don’t care.
Visualize yourself having the money. You may not have it now in real life, but visualize it as if you do.
Believing positively can really help!
Make a plan for yourself to:
- Eliminate credit card debt if you have it. You may want to pay down the higher interest rate card or perhaps, pay down the smallest balance card to feel like you’re “doing” something.
- Set out a goal to save a % of your checks once you are able to do so. Even if it’s only 3% of your earnings, perhaps you set up a tier like, save 3% for six months; 6% for six months; 9% for six months…and so on and so forth.
- Sell whatever you have that you don’t need and you may be able to profit from. Sell your engagement rings, wedding bands, old jewelry, furniture, etc. Do this to either A: set aside a savings or B: survive for the moment
- See a financial advisor
Even if today you are barely making it, having a plan in place will empower you!
Things will get better if you believe, prepare and plan for a bright future.
Don’t underestimate the power of self-talk. As someone who has wondered, “Will I make it through?” I can tell you that feeling negative and talking negatively about the situation will only entrap and weaken you.
Create a list of daily mantras to recite to yourself.
Post these daily mantras wherever you can, to remind yourself to think positively when you are not.
Tell yourself that this too shall pass, because it will. You will not struggle forever, only if you allow yourself to dwell in negativity and make poor choices.
READ ALSO: How to Create Your Vision Board in 7 Steps
Envision how you want your future to be and believe it will happen because it will! Everything changes. Nothing stays the same. If you just remind yourself that you have gotten through the bad patches before, it will make it easier for you to endure this one!
In order to thrive in the future, you will most likely have to make sacrifices today, and that’s ok! Tell yourself as you look at your lifestyle and budget what things you could really do without in order to prepare for a better financial future. You may be surprised when you see that cutting out odds and ends can make a huge difference for you and your family.
Seasons change. Our lives change. This is temporary and will pass. Things will get better if you believe, prepare and plan for a bright future. Happiness is yours for the taking: will you reach for your happiness?
Only you know the answer!
About the Author
Laura Lifshitz is a Freelance Writer, Content Creator, Comedienne, & Obsessive Chocoholic